


Substitution

by IdiotCrusader



Series: Dream Not Of What You Are [1]
Category: Warframe
Genre: Drunk Sex, HIV+ Nidus, HIV/AIDS, Heartbreak, Human!frame AU, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Stalker Has Social Anxiety, Stalking, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-12
Updated: 2018-04-12
Packaged: 2019-04-22 00:41:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14297031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IdiotCrusader/pseuds/IdiotCrusader
Summary: Human!frame where Nidus is ill and lovesick, Stalker has problems and is, well, a stalker, and they're both after Saryn.





	Substitution

**Author's Note:**

> There's your human!AU that no one asked for. Beware: there's more to come.
> 
> Questionable hurt/comfort, unholy amount of headcannons, Saryn Had Her Reasons. Stalker did nothing wrong by the way. I blame Youtube fandom ~~and Limbo just because~~.

Stalker was standing in front of his door. Nidus stared at him for a good minute. Neither of them moved.

"Last time I checked I wasn't a pretty girl," Nidus finally said, dryly. "I believe you should find yourself a better stalking target."

Stalker shifted on his feet, dragging out the pause. He seemed surprised to be addressed at all. It's been a long time since he spoke to anyone.

"I'm not here for you." His voice was hoarse from underuse. "I'm waiting for Saryn."

"Saryn? She's... " Nidus visibly cringed, taken by surprise. "We're not... We're not a thing anymore. She won't come again. You can stop wasting your time. Mine, too."

Stalker didn't leave. He shifted again, uneasy, and fidgeted with his red and black hood.

Nidus broke the silence first.

"You know what? I intend to get really fucking drunk and throw a pity party. You wanna join? You look like you need it."

Stalker didn't clarify if he was hinting at a drink or a pity party. Both seemed about right. He eyed Nidus warily for a second, deciding, before rasping:

"Yeah. Sounds good."

As if it was the most normal thing to do. Nidus waved his hand nonchalantly, stepping back into the flat to let Stalker in. His place smelled like whiskey and antiseptic.

"Just kick off your shoes at the door. Or don't bother. My place's a mess. I'm a mess."

Stalker hesitated for a second before stepping over the threshold. Nidus disappeared in the vague direction of what Stalker assumed was the kitchen. There was a huge glass box full of maggots on display on the table in the living room.

Maggots?

"Anything else you want while I'm feeling lonely and therefore nice?" Nidus called from the kitchen. "Sandwich? A shoulder to cry on? Whatever. Sorry, can't offer you dinner, the fridge is kinda full of infested moss."

Alright, Stalker guessed. Not that he wanted that dinner anyway. He could come up with a request though.

"Can we fuck instead?"

Probably shouldn't have said this one out loud.

Nidus reappeared in the doorway with two bottles of beer. He wasn't amused. Wasn't disgusted, either.

"Depends on how desperate you are."

The answer was "very".

"I'm a _stalker_."

What sort of life you'd expect a stalker to lead? Anyone would be desperate.

"Really? Haven't noticed." Nidus shrugged. "Well, I'm HIV positive. Does that make us evenly messed up?"

Turned out it did.

* * *

Stalker never felt so  _reckless_  (and possibly drunk) in his goddamn life.

Pills and blister packs littered the untidy bedroom. The smell of antiseptic only grew stronger as they ended up face to face on the bed, and Stalker instinctively pressed Nidus' hands down, holding him still with the whole of his weight. He couldn't stop looking, his hazy mind still struggling to take in whatever he got himself into.

How often do you end up fucking a random HIV+ guy that just broke up with a girl you're after?

He didn't wanna stop, though. It wasn't often Stalker got any action, he wasn't a virgin, but the burning anxiety spiked his every attempt at a real relationship, anything at all. Sex was complicated when he struggled to talk to people without his hood on.

Nidus was... easier for some reasons. He was surprisingly handsome, in a way. Not in the same way Saryn was gorgeously pretty, but there was something about his sharp features and copper red messy hair and deep husky voice that made Stalker desire him like crazy. Alcohol mattered, but no more than the relaxed compliance he's showed. No one ever submitted to Stalker at such ease, so willingly.

"What's with the starin'? Not a showpiece..." Nidus, spread on the bad in a ragdoll-soft relaxed pose, gave him an impatient nudge. His speech was slurred. He's had too much, and they both knew it. "Fuck me or fuck off."

Stalker, lead by a sudden urge, stroked alongside his face - Nidus really needed to shave - and Nidus followed his movement with a silly smile, his eyes unfocused. Damn, he was that high. For the first time, Stalker felt a minute flicker of a doubt.

"Why are we doing this?"

Nidus took a second to focus his eyes and then burst out laughing as if Stalker's concern was the funniest joke. Stalker felt weird, worrying about those things. He didn't mind what they were doing, but he wanted consent.

"Dunno about you. I'm forty, no job, HIV+ and just broke up with a woman I wanted to spend all my life with. That a good enough reason?"

Stalker was relieved to agree. Yeah. He guessed it was. Nidus fidgeted under him, clearly out of patience.

"C'mon. Condoms. The top drawer, now. You don't wanna take any chances with me."

They were both dressed, didn't even bother with their boots; Stalker imagined it would stay that way. A quick fuck with no hard feelings, clothed to not make it too intimate. Worked well for them both. He helped Nidus unclip his belt while rummaging the drawer for lube and condoms. Nice thought. Stalker wouldn't trust himself to remember protection now, and he felt kinda grateful.

This gratitude extended beyond this particular thing. The whole evening was... Maybe Stalker wanted one gesture of intimacy after all.

"Can I kiss you?" He blurted out and immediately wondered if this went too far. "I've... read it's safe."

Nidus seemed more uninterested than against it.

"Maybe. Don't bother with foreplay. 'm fine."

He tasted like whiskey and meds, even though Stalker couldn't really know what meds tasted like.

Foreplay was for the lovers. They skipped this bit.

The first thrust felt like heaven for Stalker, probably painful for Nidus. He said he'd be fine, and yet Stalker felt slightly guilty. Nidus tensed with a sharp inhale, and Stalker made himself go still for a moment. His hips were quivering from the effort of keeping still, but giving Nidus time to adjust was a common courtesy. He let Stalker have his part of fun, Stalker could as well be nice to him.

He could only wait before the body beneath him started to go slack again before giving a first tentative rock of his hips, holding back a moan. He missed this so much...

"I wish I could pretend you're Saryn", Nidus gasped, his voice fell to a desperate, breathless growl. "How pathetic would that be?"

Stalker wasn't one to judge.

"Funny, right? We're both here for her. And she's gone. And I'm not even angry at you for following her. I knew it was you all along and everyone knows you're not dangerous, so we let it slip. Me an' Saryn, I mean. Now there's no "we", and I kinda feel like you actually get me. What the actual f-fuck..." Nidus groaned, arching his back to match the thrusts.

Encouraged, Stalker sped up, feeling white-hot pleasure bloom and spread over his spine from below. The joint sound of their heavy breathing filled the sterile silence of the room, and Stalker liked that better.

He felt like he shouldn't listen too closely, or they both would regret it in the morning. Nidus was talkative from the drinks - fine, but Stalker got a feeling he'd rather not remember himself confessing his heart inside out while high as a kite and miserable. They could focus on fucking instead.

Stalker didn't feel guilty for sleeping with a screwed stranger. He asked for it, anyway. It wasn't doing any of them any harm... and god, it felt so good.

Nidus was hardly vocal, only letting out soft gasps now and then, but he kept _talking_ , explaining things Stalker didn't even know about, confessing something he shouldn't have, his voice strained with emotions and closeness of his peak. Stalker refused to listen. It was too personal, too... Nidus almost sounded like he was holding back the tears, and Stalker really didn't need to insult him with any more pity. No one would want his sympathy anyway.

So he focused on thrusting.

They both trembled. Stalker desperately fought for control, but it was never his forte - he was close, panting, shaking with the intensity of it, barely even coherent. Oh, God, just a bit more...

Nidus stopped talking, his highs and back quivered as he tried to meet Stalker's moves halfway. His breathing grew quicker and more ragged with every snap of Stalker's hips. Each forceful thrust was drawing a noise, now, a low whine that somehow brought Stalker even closer to the peak.

He sped up once more, desperate for release, feeling his heart pound. Nidus was so hot against him, so... alive, and Stalker couldn't care less if he wasn't with Saryn, because she was just a fantasy, and this was real, and it felt fucking fantastic. Nothing could feel more divine than this. Drunk, and messed up, and miserable, and so so _real_.

Nidus' moan turned into a broken sob as he finished, and that was the last thing Stalker heard before his world exploded.

* * *

It was five in the morning, and Stalker was awake.

The morning light was creeping in from the single window. Stalker lied still for a few seconds, slowly recollecting memories of the last night. He was still sore, but his consciousness was surprisingly clear. Memories flashed, like pictures in the dark: moans aloud, flushed feverish skin, the exploding pleasure... Nidus' voice on the very peak, tense and pained, _ecstatic_. The name he calls out doesn't sound like Stalker's, but that's alright.

He regrets nothing.

Nidus, still a mess, shirtless and barefoot, dozed off beside him and didn't react, while Stalker carefully crawled out of bed and fixed his belt. Stalker left him be: the second he wakes up he'd feel a pretty damn bad hangover, and there was no point waking him up to it. Stalker didn't want to leave just yet, so he wandered off to search for the bathroom instead.

A handful of ice cold water on his face later he's felt slightly more of a human being.

Still no regrets.

Nidus was nice to him, at least as nice as he could be considering the circumstances, and the sex was great. Stalker could still feel the deep-rooted satisfaction. They both knew it would be a one night stand, but it didn't mean Stalker couldn't be nice in turn. He did feel sorry for the guy after all. The whole HIV+ thing was hard on him, and it showed, and then, how could Stalker blame him for missing Saryn? He'd miss her, too.

If only he could ever have her even for the moment...

Still, Stalker somehow was neither bitter nor resentful towards Nidus. Funnily enough, it was quite the opposite.

There was a framed picture on the sink, turned the glass side down. Stalker hesitated for a second before picking it up. He already knew what he was going to see, and yet the piercing gaze of Saryn's beautiful green eyes made him flinch. Of course, why else would Nidus turn a picture down... A family photo, then?

They seemed happy.

Stalker wondered how recent this picture was, before putting it back with respectful care. Before he might've thought of stealing the photo, just to feel a bit closer to Saryn, but right now...

Stalker had problems, but he wasn't a bad person. This one should belong to Nidus.

Perhaps Stalker should get them some aspirin and breakfast. He imagined that's what a proper one night stand should finish with. Right. Breakfast. The fridge was out of the question, it seemed... Would Nidus be offended, if he took the key and went down to the local store? Was staying till he wakes up a good idea at all?

Damn it. Stalker wasn't ever good at the whole social thing, but he wanted some aspirin as soon as possible, and he couldn't trust Nidus to keep his meds in order. Taking something in this house could probably result in about any possible consequence, from a trip to an emergency.

Stalker returned to the bedroom to fish the keys out of the drawer. He gave Nidus one last look, noting to himself he was even more attractive, even though worn out, in the daylight, and quietly stepped out of the door.


End file.
